That is still one of my favorite Youtube videos. But that is not the point of this.
I’ve been meaning to write this for a while, but keep getting distracted. Did you know that apparently some boys really like girls who can make authentic cat noises? I didn’t either. For the Super Bowl I was invited to a married person party by my old roommate. I accepted because my other option was watching in my apartment alone. BORING. And then AFTER I had accepted she was like “Oh by the way, there will be one other single kid there.” TRICKED! But it was to late to turn back, and I figured I’m pretty excellent at seeming unapproachable, I will foil her clever plan by simply being myself*. SO I go, everything fine. He’s cheering for the 49rs and I had already committed to cheering for the Ravens, Because hello, I love The Blind Side. Unfortunately for me this made him feel like he should tease me about who I was cheering for, Unfortunately for him I didn’t engage, because in reality I didn’t care who won THAT much. Also his facial hair was offensive to me.
So another attendee of this party was the host couples 2 year old child, who loved me. So he comes up to me all of a sudden and meows like a cat. my ONLY option is to meow back. Which took me from the position of cool person in the room, to COOLEST person in the room. He just kept meowing at me so I would meow back and then he started rubbing his head on me, like a cat. Normally I would think this was hilarious and weird, but this time it was hilarious, weird, and useful. Because I had sort of made it my goal to make this other single kid think I was just bizarre, because I wanted to foil my roommates plans. Everything is going perfectly. Then someone else at the party mentions Tom Brady is his fave Football player. And I say Tom Brady is a douchebag, and pull out my soapbox and stand on it for a while. Turns out that kid hates Tom Brady as well, an unfortunate coincidence. He said “You’re my new favorite person!” I didn’t really even acknowledge this. Then I go back to acting like a cat. Not really my best first impression. It’s fine. We leave, and I gloat to myself because I was successful in avoiding a complete set up.
The next day my friend text me “Hey, So don’t be mad at me but Bran text my husband and asked if you would want to go out sometime.”
A couple things:
- A boy who likes a girl who acts like a cat for an hour is not to be trusted.
- He’s borderline pansy, because he didn’t just ask them for my number, he asked them to ask me out for him
- His facial hair is still offensive to me
- I actually didn’t talk to him at all.
- He’s 30 and I don’t have to date 30 year olds till I am 25
- See number 5 and number 1 read: Desperate
- I’m snobby, but it’s ok
I pitched a small fit about it but in the end said I would go. Luckily I haven’t heard back about it, Unluckily, now I feel like I can never talk to my old roommate again because she’ll suck me in.
*In one of our conversations at the Superbowl thing she was asking me if I was dating anyone and I was like no. blah blah blah. And she was like “You just don’t know how to act around boys. You need to be yourself, but way nicer.” And I just thought to myself, “So you want me to not act like myself really.”